world's first medford, oregon bachelor party

alright, so maybe not the real first, but i'm pretty sure it's the first for a group of fellas from los angeles and beyond.





welcome to medford!!! step right onto the tarmac and let the fun begin. we chose medford not for the wild night life, but for the ragin' rivers within near proximity.

















the upper klamath river raftin' posse., a.k.a. many of my best pals on the planet (and anywhere, but i'm biased of course).

















go go gadget telescope arm!!! super action photos courtesy of matthew's king kong-sized limbs.


































our little camping ground while rafting the klamath.

















a lost member of the beastie boys taunting a napping uy.

















gathered round the evening campfire.

















those roadies seemed like such a good idea at the time... an emergency pitstop on the way home.

gents, thanks for a fantastic journey!!!!

hurrah!!! dc on npr

update: looks like the producer hurt her back during editing and the story is going to run later this week. i'll let you know when i get the details. thx!

i did an hour-long interview with national public radio this morning to talk about my life as a virus slayer, spyware smusher, fraud foiler & general security wonk. fooled them into thinking i do real work ;-)

here are the shots from my treo while recording the spot with the reporter up in seattle. very cool lady named wendy kaufman and lotsa fun. as a long time NPR supporter, this was the cat's meow.

NPR says it's a three- to five-minute segment and will air at 6:50 and 8:50 a.m. in the United States on member stations that carry Morning Edition.

disaster movies & plane trips

alright, this should really be pretty obvious. it's one of those things that you figure would have been sorted out by now. i'm sitting on the plane cranking through email, reviewing documents, slogging through the to-do list and i glance up at the in flight movie. i was expecting to see something along the lines of "the wild", "eight below" or one of the many unoffensive movies you see while taking a long plane ride. not today. merely a glance revealed people, chandeliers and dinner plates careening off the walls of an ocean liner that was in the midst of plunging down to davey jone's locker. they're playing the remake of the old move poseidon featuring a prolonged cruise ship catastrophe.

why in God's name would you do this? apparently traveling on airplanes today is so dangerous that nary a bottle of aquafina nor a chapstick can be allowed onboard lest we leave the terrorists an opening to attack by undertaking feats with hairpins, ipods, and deodorants that would make macguyver look like a 6th grade science student. people's nerves are understandably on edge these days. so you're going to show them a movie about people in a general state of hysteria, slowing dying on another vehicle of mass transportation?

well, this summer's round of would-be blockbusters are going to offer a whole host of chances for the airlines to make not just minor mistakes like this one, but the type of colossal mistakes that are usually reserved for the french military and the us government. check out this summer's line-up:

World Trade Center: 'Nuff said.

United 93: Again, no need to explain.

Snakes on a Plane: Extraordinary. Can you imagine sitting on a plane while watching hundreds of lethal reptiles squirm their way around the economy section? (first class might offer some form of snake repellent seats, one would hope. prolly the best we can hope for now that steve irwin is gone.)

alright, back to work. maybe i can finish up in time to catch the next show. i'm hoping for "nacho libre". i've heard it's lousy but just like there's something naturally disturbing about watching people drown en masse, there's something naturally funny about seeing a fat man in a unitard.

current playlist

Hey You | Basement Jaxx | Crazy Itch Radio
Aguas De Marco | Antonio Carlos Jobim | The Best of Antonio Carlos Jobim
The Hop | Radio Citizen | Berlin Serengeti
Airbag | Easy Star feat. Horace Andy | Radiodread
B-Boy Stance | K-os | Joyful Rebellion
Take Me Out | Franz Ferdinand - Hot Chip Remix | Hot Chip Remixes
Nausea | Beck | The Information
Leaving So Soon | Keane | Under the Iron Sea
What Are You Afraid of? | West Indian Girl | ?
CobraStyle | Teddybears | Fresh
Fun For Me | Moloko | The Catalogue
Lotus Above Water | Telefon Tel Aviv | Fahrenheit Fair Enough
Tremendous Brunettes | Mike Doughty | Haughty Melodic

zymotic benjamin crump! & dangerous animal jobs

or in other words, i've now rec'd my 18th 5th 3rd phishing message in the past 30 days. happy tuesday!!!

and in the wake of the croc hunter's death, i openly wonder why are we surprised when people are injured/killed by wild animals when that's what they do for a living?

first roy of siegfried & roy fame gets bitch-slapped by a white tiger, ending their longstanding vegas stint since 1972 of getting tigers to behave like well-trained house cats in front of bright lights and loads of gawking turistas. count 'em, that's 33 years of getting carnivorous, giant cats to not eat them while balancing on a ball and growling out "b-i-n-g-o". an impressive run that should shock us more than a white tiger turning roy's neck into a little debbie snack cake. roy is doing better, thank you very much, and now they run the secret garden and dolphin habitat in place of the scary tiger show. all the better for them, the chances that flipper is going to go au naturelle and rip off yer head are pretty low provided that you steer clear of sardine cologne. and serious issues in the secret garden probably amount to gardenias sprouting up where you expected cantaloupes, neither of which is going to maul you if you don't water them properly. think of what they're saving on life insurance! in their own words (and mine):

"Long ago, Roy and I realized that everything that happens to this planet is man's responsibility. Our responsibility," says Siegfried. "After living and working with some of the world's most magnificent [and occasionally unfriendly] creatures, we have felt the threat of their loss [not to mention the damage their molars can inflict]. So we felt compelled to create a safe environment [for us]– an environment in which these animals could live in serenity [where we won't have to dramatically imperil ourselves to amuse you] ," says Roy.

and now the crocodile hunter, steve irwin. dear dear dear. this one is tragic and i will never look at another sting ray in the same way again. poor guy got impaled when the bugger stuck him with venemous barb right in the heart when he coasted over it while scuba diving in oz. he didn't harrass it any way, just was in the wrong place at the wrong time, startled the sting ray and it moved to defend itself by sending up its tail into the chest of the unsuspecting irwin. as a diver myself, i have to confess this is a little scary since he was supposedly just cruising the reef playing with the sponges (no reason to believe he wasn't).

an important factoid is that there have been only 17 recorded stingray deaths in Australia since 1969. rotten luck to say the least. nonethless, consider for a moment the number of things he'd done up until this point where the odds were very much in favor of something really bad [re: likely fatal] happening. the man made a living by taunting alligators, crocs, poisonous snakes, deadly spiders, etc. on video. not the type of thing that leads to longevity, right next to making yer 3 square meals a day out of snickers in a fry daddy.

so was mother nature playing a cruel joke on steve irwin or simply catching up with him for past debts like a bulldog collections agency? i haven't a clue. but what i do know, is that there is now one heckuva of a market for underwater kevlar jackets to repel sting ray barbs. if you know where i can score one, drop me a line.