i rolled out of bed about 30 minutes ago after my aching lower back reminded me that sleeping on my side is no longer the best idea any more. darks days when the fetal position doesn't get the job done! i suppose i could wedge a few properly positioned pillows at key locations and make it work, but why do that when i can simply roll-over on my back? and it's not normally that bad, it's just a little upset after 13.2 miles last sunday and pounding the pavement for 7 miles yesterday.
anyways, i finally gave in and plopped myself in front of my desktop computer to read personal email and do take a look at the news. an article called "the world in 2058" caught my eye. first off, it has a long section with vint cerf whom is one of my faves, sort of the jimmy choo of technology in janespeak. while i have to consider what the future will bring for security products and i spend a lot of brain cycles on it, i admittedly don't consider much beyond my field and if i'm still working on security products in 2058 i'd be sorely disappointed (i've promised myself this is my last job in the field i joined in 95/96).
so what did the big brains have to say?
we'll get to travel at the speed of light - i'm all for getting to places faster, but we haven't really even figured out how to safely travel by car at 70 mph yet. we were doing just fine until mobile phones came into the picture. now, every time someone weaves into a nearby lane or bumps the car in front of them, you see in their hands a phone or 'berry that was receiving more attention than their driving. now, imagine this at lightspeed! what the heck happens when you give into temptation and text your pal while traveling from NYC->TYO, only to bump into someone from Shanghai? i don't know the answer, but i'm betting you don't just bump off of them video game style and offer a polite apology.
we'll have nano devices inside us - i'm all for this. i'm thinking i could have a little gyrosleeping agent which recognized that my artificially enhanced six-pack abdomen had flipped over on its side to indulge in a little fetal position while catching a few z's. it would then smooth everything out, released some chemical or pushing some body buttons that would basically tell my lower back to piss off for a bit while i sleep how *i want to sleep*, not how it allows me to. oh yeah, and if i could get a nano device which would power up my anemic slapshot, count me in. how about one that travels to where the middle of my back itches when jane isn't around to help out? i can see my whole body as a freakin' 405 of little nano devices zipping around to cure ailments and shortcomings i simply shrug off today.
a few other interesting things were the mention that terrorism and climate change are pretty much in check by that time. not that we've "solved them" but that the planet doesn't yield under the weight of climate change and we adapt around it and terrorism is recognized as a police and not a military function. mind you, combating it means giving up fundamental privacy rights, which is mentioned as a "thorny" issue. uh yeah. banksy has done some brilliant art on privacy lately with his "one nation under cctv" graf. it also turns out that blue is the new green and we end up with a water shortage after we deal with all this sticky climate change stuff. hmmmmmm... desalination anyone?
after all of this, i'm left with a very simple longing for the future: can anyone make a really good rum raisin ice cream in 2058 that won't gird my nano-tricked out buttocks with a new layer of fat?