adios argentina, hola brazil

off to sao paulo today, which looked like a short trip but took from 11am in the morning to nearly 7pm to make the full trip. this was following some serious white-knuckling on the flight over, courtesy of air lineas, an argentinian airline with no apparent fear of turbulence. i've flown a lot of miles and i nearly thought my short time on this spinning globe was over today. damn...

more thoughts on leaving buenos aires, sao paulo and south america in general:

- airport security in south america rocks! keep your shoes on, take as many liquids as you want, leave yer laptop in yer bag, and the whole process only chews up about 5 minutes. 100% less irritating and prolly only 10% less secure than our follies.

- turns out there was a complete collapse of the argentinian economy about 5 years ago. you couldn't withdraw $$$ from the banks if you wanted to, everything was frozen. this pushed prices for real estate way down and the peso went from being 1:1 with the dollar to 1:4. today it's about 1:3 and they are about recovered. there's still a fair amount of civil unrest and even last night a group of protestors showed up at a fashion event demanding to "eat the food that they're eating". given this and the govt's propensity for an occasional socialist agenda, what looks like a great opp'ty to buy land on the cheap and make easy $$$ could end up in you losing yer shirt as your buenos aires land/home are snatched up by the govt and given to others.

- we had a fantastic local wine last night called "torrontes" (the style, not the vintner). it's a moderately sweet, white Argentinian varietal. good stuff! we also hung out at an old-school tango club which was an interesting mix of young and old dancers out to have a good time. the band was very cool as well, it consisted of a single bassist with 4 guys on accordions and another 4 on violins. great sound!

- they are completely unafraid to parade the female body at tradeshows. who are we kidding ourselves, america? guys at conferences sit in crappy halls listening to what are mostly terrible speeches then eating too much mediocre food. after tolerating all that crap, of course we all want to see a booth babe! helluvalot better than chatting it up with some smarmy, sweaty dork in bad loafers. my jaw nearly hit the floor when i saw the symantec booth babes in argentina. sure enough they had skin tight black pants with bright yellow tube tops with the symantec logo on them. our branding and hr department would shit themselves. the girls may not know a thing about the products or the company, but no one pays attention even when you do, so why bother? and what did we see right after entering customs in sao paulo? cute little brazilian booth babes handing out fliers for a show here for consumer electronics. score one for south america. call it exploitation but dammit, it works.

- we ate dinner at a stunning place tonight, check out the pic below. the whole restaurant is built around a gargantuan 100 year old fig tree. food, service and ambience were amazing. if you ever come here, don't miss out: http://www.rubaiyat.com.br/figueira/index.htm

buenos dias de buenos aires

greets from south america! down here on a biz trip to speak at a conference, chat with the media and meet with ppl from the local office. there's not a whole lotta time before we had out for the evening over here but thought i'd jot down a few interesting things from my short trip here:

- it's the birthplace of tango. how did i not know this? bought 3 tango cds, 2 modern elecrofied ones and one classic. so far so good! mai: i'll burn 'em for you as long as you don't tell the riia :-)

- it's cheap! finally, after getting raped in dublin and tokyo, i've found a place where the dollar still means something. and there's nice stuff to buy too.

- in argentina, meat is a perfectly acceptable appetizer before you eat more meat. dear lord almighty, my now pseudo-vegetarian stomach is in shock. rather than be rude, i'm eating the cow. and paying the price. they've never heard of hummus down here.

- the bottom level of the hotel is floor "0". why didn't we think of that?

- it's ok to drink wine for lunch and the wine is fan-flippin'-tastic. this is the home of malbec, and it's superb. had a bottle of "alta vista premium" yesterday for lunch and a bottle of "fond du cave" malbec for dinner. both were good, i slightly preferred the alta vista. funny story: when the argentinean man was asked if he wanted water for dinner, he replied "no, that's ok, i already washed my hands". they love their vino, and for good reason.

- damn near no traffic lights nor ipods here. not sure if there's a connection, but they seem to be alright with both of these.

here's a shot of my hotel. off to sao paulo, brazil tomorrow. hasta pronto!

opinions of questionable value for ray

garmin roadrunner 201
it's a gps pedometer you wear on your wrist. great for tracking how far you've really run and how fast. it's increased the length i run substantially since i can no longer fool myself. for example, what i used to be certain was a 4 mile run was more like 2.5 (!) it's also given me swift kick in the butt when running half marathons as i found out i was hitting mid run lulls and slowing down. result? faster halfies all around. there's a newer, cooler version but this one is good enough for me.


little miss sunshine
dear lord almighty was this funny. just about the only comedy i've seen in a long time that was worth the time and $$$. nearly as good as whiling away boring conference calls with engrish.com.

zappos.com
i like my dress shoes to have a little edge to them. not a lot, but a little. an exceptionally pointy toe, a little different color, a cool pattern in a place you wouldn't normally expect one, etc. it's damn near impossible to find this in a store without paying $300+, which is outrageous for men's shoes to me (but a cheap pair of jimmy choo's, ironically). zappos is the place to be my friend. easy, fair prices and huge selection. found my ben sherman sherbourne's there and i'm a happy camper. i don't plan on going back into a shoe store in search of dress shoes again.

fat freddy's drop
brilliant gem of band that has thus far been criminally overlooked. they fall somewhere b/w reggae and jazz. fave tracks are "hope", "roady" and "little ones". no live shows in the us apparently (uk band) and it's hard to find their stuff (offline at least). i found "based on a true story" at amoeba.

ipod mini
who needs a nano anyways? this little sucker is good enough. i still don't see why i need anything more than a monochrome screen on my mpg3 player and 4GB. and i easily have 60GB+ of music. step off the ipod treadmill.

the illusionist
not an incredible story but really well cast and played. ed norton and paul giamatti were fantastic. i was expecting very little and was pleasantly surprised.

mike doughty
he's the former front-man for soul coughing. some ppl will know them as the band who did the song "super bon bon" and "circles" which both got some airplay on major radio stations. he's been described as "street poet" more than a vocalist and i think that's not too far from the truth; his lyrics are wacky/abstract but insightful and unexpected. he doesn't take himself nearly as seriously as saul williams and ursula rucker who i like but let their opinions get in the way of simply creating something enjoyable and fun (prolly not their goal). he recently joined dave matthew's record label, RTO, and released an album of mostly older material called "haughty melodic". not sure how much more he'll do (he's been in and out of rehab for a heroin addiction), but the album is worth picking up if you like "alternative" rock and enjoyed soul coughing.

just checked, he's opening for the barenaked ladies. perfect for irene :-)

nobody knows
eerie little japanese flick about a mother who progressively abandons her kids. a little slow (i feel asleep in the middle, but i almost always do), but well worth it. beautiful and disturbing at the same time. there's a few scenes that still sort of haunt me and it's been months since we watched this on dvd.

lyrics born
the man is unstoppable. if you see something he's done, buy it. he does a large number of collabs (r.l. burnside, tommy guerrero, z-trip, etc.) and his tracks are nearly always the best on the album. oh yeah, he's a hip hop star from SF on the quannum label which is also host to blackalicious, lateef, and other rock solid underground players. he's moody in concert (i don't think he likes LA much) but he's still fantastic. joyo velarde, his female vocalist and girlfriend, is top notch. he's playing LA next week with cut chemist and has a new live album out on 10/31.

current playlist

Linea de Luz | Kinky | Reina
Me & Julio Down by the Schoolyard | Paul Simon | Negotiations & Love Songs
Rub a Dub Style | Love Trio feat U-Roy | Love Trio in Dub
Soldier Jane | Beck | The Information
Crane Wife 1 & 2 | The Decemberists | The Crane Wife
Tanto Tempo | Peter Kruder Remix, Bebel Gilberto | Tanto Tempo Remixed
Roady | Fat Freddy's Drop | Based on a True Story
Broken Levee Blues | DJ Shadow | The Oustider
Deep in the Cut | J Boogie | Dubtronic Science
Breath Control | DJ Presto | Magic LP
Terence Trent D'Arby | Sign Your Name | -
Useless Wooden Toys | Jon Kennedy | Useless Wooden Toys

finally: my clip on npr

here it is! it's not great for the 60 minutes i spent on the phone with her and i share air-time with jeff moss but it's great exposure dammit and i'll take it :-)

Link to News Clip

world's first medford, oregon bachelor party

alright, so maybe not the real first, but i'm pretty sure it's the first for a group of fellas from los angeles and beyond.





welcome to medford!!! step right onto the tarmac and let the fun begin. we chose medford not for the wild night life, but for the ragin' rivers within near proximity.

















the upper klamath river raftin' posse., a.k.a. many of my best pals on the planet (and anywhere, but i'm biased of course).

















go go gadget telescope arm!!! super action photos courtesy of matthew's king kong-sized limbs.


































our little camping ground while rafting the klamath.

















a lost member of the beastie boys taunting a napping uy.

















gathered round the evening campfire.

















those roadies seemed like such a good idea at the time... an emergency pitstop on the way home.

gents, thanks for a fantastic journey!!!!

hurrah!!! dc on npr

update: looks like the producer hurt her back during editing and the story is going to run later this week. i'll let you know when i get the details. thx!

i did an hour-long interview with national public radio this morning to talk about my life as a virus slayer, spyware smusher, fraud foiler & general security wonk. fooled them into thinking i do real work ;-)

here are the shots from my treo while recording the spot with the reporter up in seattle. very cool lady named wendy kaufman and lotsa fun. as a long time NPR supporter, this was the cat's meow.

NPR says it's a three- to five-minute segment and will air at 6:50 and 8:50 a.m. in the United States on member stations that carry Morning Edition.

disaster movies & plane trips

alright, this should really be pretty obvious. it's one of those things that you figure would have been sorted out by now. i'm sitting on the plane cranking through email, reviewing documents, slogging through the to-do list and i glance up at the in flight movie. i was expecting to see something along the lines of "the wild", "eight below" or one of the many unoffensive movies you see while taking a long plane ride. not today. merely a glance revealed people, chandeliers and dinner plates careening off the walls of an ocean liner that was in the midst of plunging down to davey jone's locker. they're playing the remake of the old move poseidon featuring a prolonged cruise ship catastrophe.

why in God's name would you do this? apparently traveling on airplanes today is so dangerous that nary a bottle of aquafina nor a chapstick can be allowed onboard lest we leave the terrorists an opening to attack by undertaking feats with hairpins, ipods, and deodorants that would make macguyver look like a 6th grade science student. people's nerves are understandably on edge these days. so you're going to show them a movie about people in a general state of hysteria, slowing dying on another vehicle of mass transportation?

well, this summer's round of would-be blockbusters are going to offer a whole host of chances for the airlines to make not just minor mistakes like this one, but the type of colossal mistakes that are usually reserved for the french military and the us government. check out this summer's line-up:

World Trade Center: 'Nuff said.

United 93: Again, no need to explain.

Snakes on a Plane: Extraordinary. Can you imagine sitting on a plane while watching hundreds of lethal reptiles squirm their way around the economy section? (first class might offer some form of snake repellent seats, one would hope. prolly the best we can hope for now that steve irwin is gone.)

alright, back to work. maybe i can finish up in time to catch the next show. i'm hoping for "nacho libre". i've heard it's lousy but just like there's something naturally disturbing about watching people drown en masse, there's something naturally funny about seeing a fat man in a unitard.

current playlist

Hey You | Basement Jaxx | Crazy Itch Radio
Aguas De Marco | Antonio Carlos Jobim | The Best of Antonio Carlos Jobim
The Hop | Radio Citizen | Berlin Serengeti
Airbag | Easy Star feat. Horace Andy | Radiodread
B-Boy Stance | K-os | Joyful Rebellion
Take Me Out | Franz Ferdinand - Hot Chip Remix | Hot Chip Remixes
Nausea | Beck | The Information
Leaving So Soon | Keane | Under the Iron Sea
What Are You Afraid of? | West Indian Girl | ?
CobraStyle | Teddybears | Fresh
Fun For Me | Moloko | The Catalogue
Lotus Above Water | Telefon Tel Aviv | Fahrenheit Fair Enough
Tremendous Brunettes | Mike Doughty | Haughty Melodic

zymotic benjamin crump! & dangerous animal jobs

or in other words, i've now rec'd my 18th 5th 3rd phishing message in the past 30 days. happy tuesday!!!

and in the wake of the croc hunter's death, i openly wonder why are we surprised when people are injured/killed by wild animals when that's what they do for a living?

first roy of siegfried & roy fame gets bitch-slapped by a white tiger, ending their longstanding vegas stint since 1972 of getting tigers to behave like well-trained house cats in front of bright lights and loads of gawking turistas. count 'em, that's 33 years of getting carnivorous, giant cats to not eat them while balancing on a ball and growling out "b-i-n-g-o". an impressive run that should shock us more than a white tiger turning roy's neck into a little debbie snack cake. roy is doing better, thank you very much, and now they run the secret garden and dolphin habitat in place of the scary tiger show. all the better for them, the chances that flipper is going to go au naturelle and rip off yer head are pretty low provided that you steer clear of sardine cologne. and serious issues in the secret garden probably amount to gardenias sprouting up where you expected cantaloupes, neither of which is going to maul you if you don't water them properly. think of what they're saving on life insurance! in their own words (and mine):

"Long ago, Roy and I realized that everything that happens to this planet is man's responsibility. Our responsibility," says Siegfried. "After living and working with some of the world's most magnificent [and occasionally unfriendly] creatures, we have felt the threat of their loss [not to mention the damage their molars can inflict]. So we felt compelled to create a safe environment [for us]– an environment in which these animals could live in serenity [where we won't have to dramatically imperil ourselves to amuse you] ," says Roy.

and now the crocodile hunter, steve irwin. dear dear dear. this one is tragic and i will never look at another sting ray in the same way again. poor guy got impaled when the bugger stuck him with venemous barb right in the heart when he coasted over it while scuba diving in oz. he didn't harrass it any way, just was in the wrong place at the wrong time, startled the sting ray and it moved to defend itself by sending up its tail into the chest of the unsuspecting irwin. as a diver myself, i have to confess this is a little scary since he was supposedly just cruising the reef playing with the sponges (no reason to believe he wasn't).

an important factoid is that there have been only 17 recorded stingray deaths in Australia since 1969. rotten luck to say the least. nonethless, consider for a moment the number of things he'd done up until this point where the odds were very much in favor of something really bad [re: likely fatal] happening. the man made a living by taunting alligators, crocs, poisonous snakes, deadly spiders, etc. on video. not the type of thing that leads to longevity, right next to making yer 3 square meals a day out of snickers in a fry daddy.

so was mother nature playing a cruel joke on steve irwin or simply catching up with him for past debts like a bulldog collections agency? i haven't a clue. but what i do know, is that there is now one heckuva of a market for underwater kevlar jackets to repel sting ray barbs. if you know where i can score one, drop me a line.